What parents should do, and should never do, at mealtimes!
Family mealtimes can be incredibly special, but they can also be one of the toughest hurdles parents face! Fussy eating is an ongoing issue, and once children learn how to push your buttons by using eating as a bargaining tool, things can get even more fraught. Charlotte Stirling-Reed, bestselling author and founder of The Baby and Child Nutritionist, offers some great advice on achieving happy mealtimes!
Published
‘As a nutritionist, I like to focus on positive things we can do at mealtimes to make things smoother. I avoid focusing on things parents ‘shouldn’t’ do, as every family and situation is different. However, I’ve worked with families for a long time and I know that there are many pitfalls around mealtimes that can really impact on our toddlers’ eating. Here are some of the dos and dont’s.’
DON’T
*Pressure to eat
Research shows that pressuring kids to eat certain foods can actually diminish their enthusiasm to eat, achieving the opposite of what we want. Removing this pressure can help children enjoy mealtimes more and encourage them to try new foods.
*Pressure to finish up food
Instead of insisting children finish their plates, it’s better to let them decide when they’ve had enough. Kids are generally good at regulating their own appetites from a young age. Factors like sleep, weather, illness, and distractions can affect their hunger, so allowing them to choose how much to eat works best in the long run.
*Multitask while they eat
While it’s tempting to multitask, sitting down with your child during meals can make the experience more enjoyable for them. Toddlers look up to their parents and want to spend time with them. Taking a break to sit with them can help them feel more engaged and make mealtimes more pleasant.
*Always eat separately
Babies and toddlers learn by observing. If they never see their parents eating, they won’t understand the importance of mealtimes. Being a role model by taking time to sit, eat, and enjoy food with them can positively influence their eating habits.
Instead of insisting children finish their plates, it’s better to let them decide when they’ve had enough. Kids are generally good at regulating their own appetites from a young age.
*Label foods as ‘good’ and ‘bad’
Labelling foods can have the opposite effect of what you want. It can
add pressure to eat ‘good’ foods and make ‘bad’ foods more appealing.
Instead, talk about all foods as being equal and focus on balanced
eating.
*Offer foods as a reward
This can create a food hierarchy, making the rewarded foods more
attractive. Children may prefer some foods over others and start refusing some of the
foods you want them to enjoy. It’s better to avoid using food as a
reward to encourage kids to eat something.
*Exclude them from having any choice in meals
Involving kids in mealtime decisions can help them feel more engaged
and independent. This could include meal prep, shopping, setting the
table or choosing between two different meal options.
*Make mealtimes a chore
Stressful mealtimes can negatively impact how children feel about
eating. It’s important to create a calm and enjoyable mealtime
environment. Taking a step back from pressuring them to eat up, and find
ways to make mealtimes more pleasant.
Research shows that families who eat together positively influence their children’s diets.
DO
*Sit together at mealtimes
Sitting together for meals can benefit babies, toddlers, children and
families by fostering learning, playing, listening and social skills
development. Despite busy schedules, making time to sit together can
bring families closer.
*Eat together
Sharing food with your family and children can introduce them to a
wider variety of food, and to understand cultural importance around some
mealtime traditions. It can also help little ones to understand the
social aspect of eating too. Sitting and eating together will help your
little ones to feel more involved and curious about what’s going on at
the table. Being present and eating similar foods at mealtimes can help
children accept a wider variety of foods. Research shows that families
who eat together positively influence their children’s diets.
*Involve babies in mealtimes
From an early age, bring babies to the table to be part of the meal.
Establish regular family mealtimes to create a routine that everyone
looks forward to.
*Make choice part of mealtime
Giving kids a say in their meals can increase their willingness to
eat. Offer choices like “Do you want X or Y with your dinner?” or let
them choose from multiple sides. Even young babies can benefit from a
variety of options.
*Get little ones involved in mealtimes
Involving children in mealtime tasks like laying the table, mixing,
serving, or even cleaning up can make them feel more included and make
mealtimes more special.
*Cook together
Cooking with children, especially on weekends, can be a fun way to
teach life skills. Baking bread or cakes with toddlers or helping older
children with more sophisticated and varied cooking can uncover hidden
talents and encourage a love for preparing food.
*Make mealtimes fun
Start mealtimes with a quick question round or a simple game to make
them more enjoyable and social. Establishing these traditions early can
make children more likely to continue participating in family meals as
they grow older.
*Create a positive mealtime environment
Keep mealtimes light and avoid negative topics. Play soft music and
make the environment enjoyable to encourage children to want to be part
of family meals.
*Discuss meals and foods
Talk about the meals and foods on offer, encouraging honest opinions
and perhaps even rating the meals for the week. This can help children
be more mindful about their food choices and preferences.
*Keep the pressure off
Avoid pressuring children to eat or making them stay at the table
until they finish their meal. Focus on what’s eaten over a week rather
than day-to-day to prevent negative associations with food and create a
positive eating environment.
